My Functional Adult
Throughout our lives, we get messages about our worth that leave us feeling less than, in so many ways. As children, we are told we are deficient in knowledge. Children are, in fact, deficient in knowledge. Brains are not fully developed until we are 24-26 years old and we have to learn things first and then get smart. Children are always being told it works the other way around and end up feeling unworthy and unloveable and deficient as they grow into adulthood.
People in their 40s and 60s and 70s still seeing themselves as that bad and stupid child who stole something from a teacher’s desk or disappointed their parents or failed in a class in grade school or high school, even though they have lived exemplary lives for longer than their 18 years of childhood “stupidity”.
Our families, our communities, the media and our peers can help or hinder our self-esteem and development. We are told we need to learn to love ourselves. We go through life trying to find our way, our path, our true self. Often there is no direction and no guidance in this process. Life is, quite simply, a journey and sometimes everyone needs a tour guide to keep from heading the down the same troublesome roads time after time
So many people come into my office feeling hopeless about their lives and relationships. They have tried so many things and can’t seem to figure it all out. They believe themselves to be lost causes.